Sunday, January 27, 2019

When Mama Bears Grocery Shop

Grocery shopping is bad enough. Grocery shopping on a Sunday afternoon is even worse. Grocery shopping on a Sunday afternoon with a kid in tow is no fun at all.

But, sometimes it's a necessary evil. I had to get the shopping done today, and I had to take a kid with me. So off we went, list in hand so it could be a quick, in-and-out trip. Of course, it never quite works out that way, does it?

About 10 minutes into our shopping, my son announced that he needed to use the bathroom. I immediately felt a tug of panic; I despise public restrooms, and I am especially weary of sending my sons in to the bathroom on their own. I don't trust strangers in restrooms; I just don't. But, I know this kid, and when he says he has to go, he means it. So we headed to the bathrooms near the store's cafe, as I knew that there are single stall bathrooms with locking doors. It was the safest scenario.

This particular grocery store has a bar in their cafe, and it was fairly busy for a Sunday afternoon. I helped my son navigate his way through the crowd, watched until I heard the door lock, and then I backed off a bit. It's tricky to handle these situations sometimes; my son has Down syndrome, but he is also a teenager, and he needs to experience these things on his own. Someday, he'll do them without me, so if nothing else, I thought it would be a good learning experience. I retreated toward the back of the cafe, where I could see the door of the restroom and keep tabs on anyone else in the area (I don't trust strangers, remember?).

After several minutes, I became uneasy. I wanted to get the shopping done, and I was tired of waiting. I went back to make sure my son was ok. After knocking on the door, and discovering that he was fine and just taking forever, I stepped back a few feet and continued to wait for him. A few minutes later, a bar patron came marching back toward the bathroom, pounded on the door of the bathroom where my son was, and yelled "What are you doing?! Jackin' off??"

It was then that I felt that hot flash of fury that mothers often feel when someone messes with their kids.

I stepped forward, ready to punch him, but somehow restrained myself enough to inform him that my kid with disabilities was in there, and would need another moment. I could smell the alcohol on him; he had clearly had too much to drink. I'm guessing he thought his buddy was the one in the restroom, but is that really an excuse to use that type of language, in a grocery store?! He quickly retreated, and I tried to calm myself as I continued to wait for my son. I knew I would have to pass him when we finally left the restroom area, but would I be able to keep myself from making a scene? I mean, even if he didn't mean to do it, he had still verbally assaulted my kid, and probably scared him to death by pounding on the door.

Fortunately, when my son came out of the bathroom, that particular patron had left the bar area. Perhaps my mama bear reaction scared him away? Hopefully someone was there to drive him safely home.

We were able to finish our shopping, although I didn't get everything on my list. We both just wanted to get out of there. My son is trying to get over a cold, and I think the excursion exhausted him. After arriving home, I immediately completed the survey on my receipt to inform the grocery store's corporate office of the incident. I also suggested that they take the opportunity to review with their bartenders the protocol for not serving people who are clearly intoxicated.

I had hoped that this would be a good learning experience for my son (navigating a crowd on his own). Instead, it was a learning experience for me, and further confirmed my feelings that some people just aren't to be trusted...and that grocery shopping pretty much sucks, no matter what.

Next week, someone remind me to set up an online order for my groceries...